Interactions that Move Us

When was the last time you had an interaction that moved you? You may think that being moved by an interaction does not matter as long as the necessary information is successfully exchanged. But if you look back at the best interactions you’ve ever had, you may recognize that this is not true.  

A moving interaction leaves you feeling that you have truly connected with someone. You co-experience a moment with them and feel it resonate between you. It is not about exchanging information exchange, solving a problem, or necessarily disclosing something personal, but about co-experiencing the space between you, which neither one of you could have created alone.  

Why should you notice and create these moving interactions? They expand the range of what you can experience and help you develop greater emotional depth. It is like ‘learning something new’, except the learning happens through your senses.

In my last newsletter, we looked at the difference between real and realistic. Realistic is reverse-engineered from the experience it is meant to produce. Real comes from a source that exists on its own. A moving interaction entails real engagement and real presence. It involves trust, safety, intimacy, surprise, curiosity, and openness, and expands the range of what you can sense.

If you are not sure what I mean, consider your experiences with art, music, architecture, or nature. Something shifts in us when we are fully present to them. When it comes to people, a moving interaction can be even more powerful because this effect can be mutual. It is a two-way street: both participants are present, and both are affected. (For those of you who have pets, I know you would argue that a moving interaction is possible with your pets as well. Noted and agreed.)

Did you notice that while AI has made our interactions more efficient, they often “don’t feel like anything” anymore?

It is difficult to articulate or even justify a craving for the type of interactions that “feels like something”. It sounds too vague, doesn’t it? Compare it to wanting “something yummy” after a meal even when you’re not physically hungry, because the food you’ve eaten wasn’t delicious and didn’t make you feel anything. A delicious meal makes you feel something wonderful through your senses. Similarly, a moving interaction makes you feel the warmth and depth of a real connection.

It is through moving interactions that we build trust, experience real growth, and learn to fine-tune our responsiveness. To have more interactions that truly move you, try this:

·        Experience the interaction through your senses, don’t just process it intellectually.

·        Ask questions with real curiosity rather than questions the answers to which are expected.

·        Notice whether you and other participants in the interaction are free to surprise, challenge, amaze or disappoint each other, going beyond the prescribed and predictable paths.

When my clients leave a coaching session feeling deeply moved, not just having understood something intellectually, I know that as an executive coach, I have done my job well.

Getting additional information is easy these days, but having interactions that truly move us is a real treasure. So, protect interactions that ‘feel like something’. Seek them out. Make room for them. They expand the range of what we can feel, understand, and become.

For the coming year, I wish you many wonderful moving interactions. L’Shana Tova!

*****

Please forward this to someone who may be thinking about moving interactions in their lives. And if you want to discuss the implications of such interactions in your work and life, please reach out.
***

With gratitude,

Alina

Dr. Alina Bas, PCC, MCS
Executive Coach & Strategist
Adjunct Professor, NYU Graduate School of Arts and Science
https://AlinaBas.com/schedule
Alina@AlinaBas.com

NEWS & UPDATES

CREDENTIALING UPDATE: I’m excited to share that I have earned the International Coaching Federation’s Mentor Coach Specialization at both the ACC and PCC levels. The MCS recognizes the specialized ability to observe coaching, evaluate it at the appropriate credential level, and provide developmental feedback that helps other coaches grow. The MCS recognizes the specialized ability to observe coaching, evaluate it at the appropriate credential level, and provide developmental feedback that helps other coaches grow.

10-Hour MENTOR COACHING INTENSIVE:
I’m launching this course for experienced ACC, PCC, and MCC coaches who mentor other coaches. Across five two-hour Zoom sessions, participants will strengthen accurate observation, credential-level calibration, evidence-based feedback, bias awareness, and group mentor coaching skills. The cohort meets September 23, 24, 28, and 30 and October 1, from 7:00 to 9:00 p.m. ET. Application for 10 ICF CCE credits is pending. Beginning 1/27/27, new mentor coaching hours for ICF credential applicants must be completed with a coach who holds the MCS. Please share this program with an experienced credentialed coaches who mentors others and may be affected by this change! Many qualified mentor coaches still do not know that the requirements are changing.Mentor Coaching Skills Intensive This fall, I am teaching a live, 10-hour

ACADEMY OF HUMAN-LED COACHING: The biggest update is that ... launching the Academy of Human-Led Coaching. Its comprehensive coach education program will prepare the next generation of professional coaches for ICF credentialing and for deeply human work in an AI-saturated world. The Mentor Coaching Skills Intensive is the Academy’s first offering, and I will share more as the larger program takes shape. If you ever thought of getting coach certification, this could be a great opportunity. Sign up to  be the first to know about the updates on this program.

YOUR CAREER UPDATE: If you are still employed, this is the best time to preserve the professional history and information you may lose access to when you leave. Here is my practical checklist: Prepare for a Layoff by Saving Your Professional History.

COACHING UPDATE: If you need clarity in making a high-stakes decision that you can stand by and live with while facing uncertainty, please reach out for a Strategic Planning Sessions. 

NEWSLETTER

Did a friend share this with you? Please sign up for my newsletterand get your own free monthly-ish idea boost. Let's stay connected! 

*****

RECENT ARTICLES

When even the moon feels boring

New Year, same you
On your own terms
Do people still need people?
Ask the right questions
Solomon's Paradox (why you can give great advice, but can't take it yourself)
The 'deep river' principle (how to tell real from fake)
Effective alternative to 'searching'
Making a wish when torn beetween outcomes
What will you remember?
How will things end?
The Marvin Syndrome: Brilliant & Underutilized
Choose your mess
An antidote to loneliness
A fresh start
Vonnegut's Take on Your Career
How to talk to a person in crisis